Home is Where the Answers Are

Of all the objections to homeschooling I have heard, the one that defeats me the most is some variation of, “Well, your kids are suited for homeschooling...they are so cooperative.   My kids would never listen to me.”  This argument makes unfortunate inferences that were probably unintended by the speaker like:  “Homeschooling is easy for you because you have compliant children," (it doesn’t take effort, creativity or tenacity on your part... just luck),  “I am an ineffective parent whose unruly children do not behave or respect me,” or "Homeschooling is a departure from what is normal or natural."    

The objection is unfortunate because it is so misguided.  But how can I argue?  I cannot claim to know another parent’s child as well as he, and I certainly cannot attack his parenting skills on this basis.  Furthermore, even among the homeschooling community more agree with his objection than disagree.  And yet, I know that despite the many times I’ve heard homeschooling “experts” and supporters admit that homeschooling isn’t for every child, – every single child can learn well at home.  How can I make this outlandish claim?  Because every child does.  

Before any child enters school he learns an entire language.  Before age five most children learn social, physical and intellectual skills.  They learn manners, their ABCs, simple songs, how to walk, run, how to tie their shoes.  They learn their colors, shapes, numbers and nursery rhymes.  At least, the children in good homes do.  “But”, one might ask, “What about those less fortunate?”  Well, they learn, too.

Every child learns at home, although what they learn varies.  Children in less stable or dysfunctional homes may learn survival or coping skills.  They may learn when it is best to withdraw, act out or manipulate a situation.  They may learn how to meet their own basic personal needs and the needs of other siblings like acquiring food or seeking shelter.  They learn how to protect their families from discovery from outsiders who may threaten what little cohesion the family does have.  I know of one severely neglected child who learned to diaper herself at two years old.  

That is not to say that all children should be homeschooled.  The simple point is, learning happens.  This is the mantra of the unschooling movement, and while I personally do not follow their formal method of education (or lack thereof), I can’t disagree with their premise.  Children learn.  At home and at school, in all environments and through multitudinous ways, children learn.  Through the influence and efforts of parents, teachers and mentors and despite parents, teachers and mentors.  This is not to say that parents, teachers and mentors are irrelevant.  They may not determine whether a child learns, but they undoubtedly affect what a child learns.

I will assume that, if you are reading this blog, your children identify with the fortunate group who enjoy a healthy home environment.  You may have taught (or will teach) your child to speak, walk, ride a tricycle, dress himself, and sing a major C scale forward and backward: “Do-Re-Me-Fa -So-La-Ti-Do-Do-Ti-La-So-Fa-Me-Re-Do”.  You may have already taught her the sounds of most farm animals, that frogs lay eggs that hatch into tadpoles, and that the moon is in constant motion.  Congratulations, you qualify as a home educator!  It is not too far a leap from teaching these simple concepts to teaching formal curricula. You are a much more capable teacher than you may think you are!

A reasonable rebuttal would be that these are examples of information common to adults, every day experiences, skills and observations; teaching algebra, or biology or English grammar is another matter.  What this rebuttal misses is that parents have a unique advantage over classroom teachers.  We have the advantage of receiving our teacher’s “certification” over a much larger time frame than the professional teacher.  We tackle what we know first, and grow with our children to handle the tougher subjects when the time comes.  The parent of a preschooler has eight years to get algebra under her belt!  So, we start with number concepts and counting, and progress to operations, place value, fact families, multiplication tables, fractions, negative numbers and by the time the kids reach the middle grades we are ready with at the most a little prep to move on to algebra. 

Of course, fear drives the hesitation parents feel about taking on the awesome responsibility of formally educating one’s own child, especially those children who aim for a college degree.  Take courage.  The most brilliant minds of history were not the products of a professional education industry but initially taught by their own parents or tutors in the home.  The task is not as impossible as it seems.  Public education is a recent phenomenon in human history. 

I do grant that today the sheer volume of information that children must learn by the time they graduate high school exceeds that required of children just decades ago.  But the homeschooling parent does not teach in a vacuum, nor does he rely exclusively on his own knowledge and talents. There is a lot of help “out there” for homeschooling parents, just as there is for teachers.

You are a much more capable teacher than you may think you are, and you do not have to be an “expert” educator.  We parents often presume that today’s teachers are wellsprings of knowledge.  But certified teachers are actually practitioners of methodology, more sociologists than instructors.  In order to manage classrooms of many children with various personalities, diverse cultures and a range of skill levels, teachers may be appropriately expert in child development, conflict resolution, standards and benchmarks or learning styles but less so in actual subject matter.  Today’s teachers need not be grammarians, historians or philosophers.  Some may be, but many are not.  After all, material resources provide subject matter.  Generally, today’s teacher’s facilitate learning, but they do not teach in the classic sense of the word.

Home is the most natural place for all children to learn.  It is the first classroom for most American children.  Why should that change just because the child has reached the age of six?  Your children can learn at home.  They already have.

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